France v England. 13/06/17

"Why would a suicide bomber blow himself up here? You won't find anywhere cheaper for a baguette and a Kronenbourg in Paris."

France 3-2 England. Stade de France.
Tuesday 13/06/17.

Think of your mothers birthday and what images come to mind? A nice bunch of flowers? A box of chocolates? Maybe even a good bottle of wine? My mother received none of those things this year. Her combined Mothers Day and birthday present was in fact a trip to the Stade de France to watch France v England in an international friendly.

This may seem odd. Plenty of people have been put off traveling to Paris due to the spate of terrorism attacks, one of which occured when a suicide bomber blew himself up metres from the turnstiles of Stade de France less than two years ago. And while plenty of mothers would've preferred those flowers or chocolates, Alison McCarthy wanted to witness Kieran Trippier's England debut. France away it was.

Brighton on Tour

Alison's one previous experience of traveling away with England had come a year ago in the Euros. She sure knows how to pick her games, as on that occasion it was down in Marseille against Russia, an occasion played out to running battles throughout the city with locals and MMA trained Russians. Avoiding ISIS would be a walk in the park in comparison.

That Marseille trip had begun and ended in Paris, which meant that most of what there is to see had been seen. I'd returned a further two times to the city over the course of England's disastrous Euro 2016 campaign. I'd watched a game on the big screen in front of the Eifell Tower. Avoided being pick pocketed at the Louvre. Got a bad back at Notre Dame. Walked (illegally) thought the tunnel where Princess Diana died. Spent an evening drinking with two lovely ladies next to Moulin Rouge. Nearly been mown down on the Champs Elysee. Paris was, as they say, completed.

Arc de Triomphe constituted the days sightseeing

That meant it was just a quick trip for the final England game of the season. Arrive at Charles De Gaule at 10am on game day, leave at 8pm the following day. A straight forward plan in which nothing could go wrong, surely? 

We had only been in the country for 10 minutes when the heightened security bought about after several years of terrorist attacks introduced itself as, for reasons that nobody still understands, the entire station at the airport was evacuated. This led to utter confusion as people just milled around outside with plenty of station officials doing that most French of things, the Gallic shoulder shrug. This was an ominous start to proceedings but after 10 minutes whatever the emergency situation was was over and it was off to the city centre via the Arc De Triomphe where we would collect our tickets.

This was the one sight Alison hadn't seen on our last visit and so she was probably the only England fan happy with the location of the collection point, given that the poor man's Marble Arch is miles out of the centre and most supporters passed through Gare Du Nord on arrival. Stick the ticket collection point at the cities main station? Don't be silly! If the FA had any common sense, they could be dangerous.

A rare luxury - a hotel near Notre Dame

Alison's mood at seeing Arc De Triomphe improved even further with our accommodation near Notre Dame. Regular readers will know that being the tightest man on the planet, I always try and skimp on accommodation costs by staying in multiman hostel rooms, traveling on overnight transport or in some cases just sleeping rough.

On Alison's previous trip I had relented slightly and booked a hotel, albeit the cheapest one I could find. This turned out to be in one of Paris' red light districts which is the last place you want to be staying with your mother. There was relief all round then when an actual, proper hotel not surrounded by sex shops was our base for the trip.

Thankfully, I am blessed with a mother who likes her beer and so we were soon off to meet up with the rest of the Brighton contingent of Dean, Lewis, Ciaran and Mark. They had had an unsavoury incident with a large gang of pickpockets at Gare De Nord earlier in the day. Fortunately they had got out of it unscathed but after such events the only way to get over then is with several drinks and Alison and myself were only to happy to help in that regard.

The queues build at the Stade de France security checks

With security said to be tight, we headed off to Saint Denis two hours before kick off. There were plenty of outside units selling alcohol around the stadium which vindicated the early arrival although one portaloo for 60,000 odd fans alighting at the station seemed wildly ambitious.

 There were three security checks to get in and, in typical French style, it was absolute bloody chaos at all of them. The first was prior to the away turnstiles with fans being funnelled into a small gap tighter than nun. A cursory glance at any sort of paper that could resemble a ticket was all it took to pass that. After the stress of being crushed there, we had more beer from one bar directly outside the away turnstiles, Les Rendezvous.

This I discovered afterwards was basically the exact spot where one of the suicide bombers detonated his belt on that fateful evening in November 2015. If anything rams home how mad these people are, it's that he chose to blew himself when he could've paid £5 for a pint of Kronenbourg and a ham and cheese baguette. Practically giving it away by Paris' standards.

A giant England flag in the home end to show 'solidarity' after
the Manchester and London Bridge attacks

National Anthem time in the Stade de France

Of course there have been plenty more terrorist attacks since then, two of them recently in Manchester and London. Before this game, I was becoming extremely weary of what feels like the sense that every single international game these days has to mourn something or other just for the sake of mourning. Its become almost as if football associations and clubs are putting on these shows purely to say "Look at us and how caring we are". We had had a minutes silence three days previously at Hampden Park when playing Scotland away. Why did we need another one here, let alone French fans making a giant England flag or joining in with God Save The Queen or an Oasis sing-along befire kick off? Well, I take it back as it actually ended up being pretty moving stuff and it definitely helped the atmosphere inside the stadium for what was essentially a nothing friendly.

The Stade de France itself was excellent, three tiers and a sea of red, white and blue thanks to virtually every home supporter in the ground waving a tricolour around. The French were in fine voice and so were the English, penned in one lower tier corner. The huge gaps between the roof and the back of the stands in some grounds would mean a lot of the noise escaping but not here. Those gaps also allowed for a brilliant view of a quite beautiful sunset.

Le Tricolore - the worlds best flag?

A full away end at Stade de France

History was made for several reasons during the game itself. One being that this wasn't the normal sluggish and turgid encounter that friendlies tend to be. Second was Theresa May becoming the first Prime Minister in history to join in with a Mexican Wave. It was much reported that she was also the only English supporter in the ground to join in given the Three Lions support much heralded hatred of them but I am ashamed to admit this is actually fake news - Alison McCarthy herself joined in. She does have much to learn about England away yet.

Third was that we got to witness the first ever red card by video assistant referee. Raphael Varane was the man, sent from the field of play for bringing down Dele Alli in the box a few minutes into the second half after the referee consulted another official who had the benefit of television replays. There was a lot of confussion inside the stadium as nobody actually realised what was going on. It seemed to take forever from the awarding of the penalty to Varane being flashed the red card and it wasn't until reading reports afterwards that we knew we'd witnessed a piece of history. Clearly, communication to the crowd needs to be improved as does how quickly a decision can be made. Early days, but those who said video referees wouldn't affect the flow of the game may have to reconsider.

France 3-2 England

That penalty allowed captain Harry Kane to equalise for England. He had put them 1-0 up in the first half, only for Samuel Umtiti and Djibril Sidibe to put Les Bleus ahead at the break. France were not all full strength but they still looked far better than England with the Three Lions relying on Tom Heaton and then Jack Butland to prevent the game running away from them. Ousmane Dembele scored France's winner and despite playing against 10 men, England couldn't find a way through. 3-2 it finished, a far cry from the snoozefest against Scotland three days earlier.

After the game we returned to the Jihadi Bar for more Kronenbourg and to let the crowds die down. It was all very relaxed as French and English supporters swapped flags and stories. Remarkably, we found something to do on the Wednesday before the fight home with a visit to Parc Des Princes to have a snoop around the home of Paris Saint Germain.

Parc des Princes - home of Paris Saint Germain

The quite brilliant Stade Jean-Bouin, home to Stade Francais

PSG are excellently located in what must be one of the finest sporting quarters of any city in Europe given that Rugby union side Stade Francais have their stadium next door and Roland Garos is just across the road. Three sporting venues ticked off in 30 minutes - and there was me saying there was nothing left to do in Paris.

Steak and beer in the Chatelet area of the city wrapped up Alison's birthday treat. "What might you want next year then?" I asked her as we headed back to Charles De Gaule afterwards for the short hop back to Gatwick. A ticket to England's first group game of the World Cup in Russia was her reply. Yeah, we might need to take a rain check on that one.

France: Hugo Lloris, Djibril Sidibe 1 (Christophe Jallet), Raphael Varane, Samuel Umtiti 1, Benjamin Mendy (Lucas Digne), Ousmane Dembele 1, Paul Pogba, N'Golo Kante, Thomas Lemar, Olivier Giroud (Laurent Koscielny), Kylian Mbappe.

England: Tom Heaton (Jack Butland), Phil Jones (Aaron Cresswell), John Stones, Gary Cahill, Kieran Trippier (Adam Lallana), Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain, Eric Dier, Ryan Bertrand (Kyle Walker), Raheem Sterling, Dele Alli, Harry Kane 2.

Attendance: 75,000.

Germany v England. 22/03/17

"A 20 minute train delay? Have Southern Rail secretly taken over Deutsche Bahn?"

Germany 1-0 England. Signal Iduna Park. Wednesday 22/03/17

It may have said Germany v England in an international friendly on the match ticket. It may have been reported by such reputable sources as The Times and the BBC as being Germany v England in an international friendly. But this was not Germany v England in an international friendly.

This was in fact the Lukasz Podolski tribute match. After 130 games, 48 goals and one World Cup winners medal, this was Podolski's final game for Die Mannschaft in front of a capacity crowd who had turned out to worship him at Borussia Dortmund's Signal Iduna Park.

The love in started before kick off. Podolski captained the side; there was a delightful video played in his honour on the four giant big screens in each corner of this footballing cathedral; he then even made a speech to the masses. 

Can you imagine England's only comparable international in the form of Wayne Rooney being feted in that manner at Wembley if he ever calls time on his Three Lions career? If it did happen, you can bet your life that some cretins would boo throughout. Which is what some of the more pond life like element of the away support did here with sad predictably. 

Podolski had the last laugh though, scoring a quite brilliant goal - number 49 - from a full 30 yards before departing to a standing ovation as the music from Gladiator was played. That was frankly ridiculous but it did beg the question, why aren't movie title tracks utilised more when substitutions occur? Find me someone who says they don't want to see Raheem Sterling being replaced to the sound of My Heart Will Go On from Titanic or Eric Dier exiting proceedings to Beauty and the Beast's Be Our Guest and you will have found me someone lying through their teeth.

It wasn't just a productive evening of work for Podolski either as yours truly managed to visit European country 28/42 on this trip by going via Luxembourg. There were two reasons behind what looks on paper like a ridiculous route to have taken. The first was that this was my third visit to Dortmund and so rather than go to a town that is, footballing reasons aside, pretty dull, it was a good opportunity to visit somewhere new. The second was that given than Luxembourg City is not somewhere many people choose to go to for anything other than business, flights to and from Europe’s fourth smallest country and travel onwards to Dusseldorf came in at less than £50. Strap me in.

Hiding from prostitutes in Luxembourg City's
bars was a great game to play

That travel came in the shape of an overnight coach from Luxembourg to Dusseldorf which didn't leave until 5am Wednesday morning. The plan therefore was simple. Don't bother booking any accommodation, just find a nightclub and wait until the early hours, jumping straight on the bus and sleeping for the duration of the five hour journey across the border and into the heart of the Rhineland. This approach had worked very well when travelling from Munich to Ljubljana for Slovenia away back in October and there was no reason to assume it wouldn't work here.

Pint of Bofferding please bar keep

Except of course that Munich is a city renowned for its drinking culture and has a wealth of bars. Luxembourg City is frankly on a par with Blackburn for its Tuesday nightlife, although with what I suspect is a slightly more lively prostitution scene if the number of girls standing around on street corners, actively offering their wares like something from a Victorian novel was anything to go by. Things did originally look promising for the "spend all night drinking" plan when I stumbled across a bar in which a huge party was kicking off. That was until every custodian buggered off at 1am, leaving just the four hours to kill traipsing around the city freezing cold and then waiting at the bus stop. Who says following England away is all glamour?

Schumacher Alt

Other than spending the night on the streets, things went well and Dusseldorf was reached by 10am on game day. That left enough time to pick up a bratwurst for breakfast and meet friends Lewis, Ciaran, Mark and Dean for several beers.  Much like it's near neighbour Cologne, Dusseldorf is an excellent drinking city which specialises in 0.2l beers. Finish one of those little beauties and the barman will instantly bring you another. This will keep happening until you place your beer mat on top of your last empty glass to signal no more. Rather than the Kolsch you get in Cologne, in Dusseldorf it is Altbier, a darker, heavier beer that tastes similar to pale ale. Four of those in the famous Schumacher Brauhaus (unfortunately not named after Michael) and it was off to Dortmund. 

A train delayed in Germany? What is this madness?

Being a resident of Sussex and therefore a frequent victim of Southern Rail's train 'service', trips to Germany are always refreshing to experience how a train system should work. Imagine the horror then when our train to Dusseldorf was delayed by 20 minutes, surely an unheard of occurrence in a country famous for its efficiency and punctuality? Deutsche Bahn do not even have a delay repay scheme in place unlike Southern. That wasn't the end of the transport woes either as Dean and Co's taxi crashed once we arrived in Dortmund on their journey from station to hotel. Another myth surrounding Germany - that they are excellent drivers - was shattered.

Markt Square

England fans gather before the game with Lukas Podolski

After a few beers in Markt Square where several hundred England supporters had gathered for the traditional boot football as high as possible into air game, the car crash survivors and myself headed away to a restaurant serving what can only be described as the greatest schnitzel I've ever had was served. Such was the quality of this piece of pork wrapped in breadcrumbs that not even the fact the place was packed and we had to sit outside in the cold could take away from the delight of the meal.

Schitznel and beer with the taxi crash crew

From there it was onto Signal Iduna Park. The local police had instructed England fans to get off at a certain U Bahn stop as they wanted to ensure everyone got straight in the ground with no mixing with the home support. Needless to say we weren't having any of that and got off a stop early, walking to the stadium, outside of which there were plenty of outlets selling cans of beer and where you could mingle with the Podolski supporters. We even had time to have a 100m race on the athletics track adjacent to the main stand and then a go at the long jump. Neither performance in these events was particularly impressive.

Complimentary German flags? Don't mind if we do

Thomas Muller

After collecting some complimentary Germany flags which went down a treat with our fellow England supporters and obtaining some "selfies" with the members of Die Mannschaft's triumphant 2014 squad which are painted on the side of the same double decker that was in Berlin for last year's friendly, it was off into the stadium. My previous two visits to watch Dortmund have come in the light yet the place was even more magical in the dark, four steep stands including the famous Yellow Wall opposite us were shrouded in darkness, surrounding the pristine and brilliantly lit green carpet below. 

Let the Podoloski Love In commence

Visit three but Signal Iduna Park remains breathtaking

The away section is up with the God's but the England fans created quite a racket. So much in fact that there was something of a backlash from the FA and the press about some of the more outdated war related chants. Bad tasting? Yes. Disgraceful? No not really when most of the German football supporters I've become friends with down the years through these trips don't mind a laugh and a joke about their past. The anger and outcry smacked of the current trend of people taking offence on other people's behalf.

Gareth Southgate took a bold approach by playing the fashionable-thanks-to-Antonio-Conte 3-4-1-2 formation and it largely worked as England played surprisingly well, only being undone by that moment of magic from Podolski. There were a couple of chances to get on the scoresheet but not enough to convince Coventry Sara and myself to stay for the final 10 minutes, given we both had to get the 23.15 from Dortmund back to Dusseldorf. 

Signal Iduna Park's away end is up with the Gods

It was at this part of the journey that one of the stranger things you are likely to see at a football game appeared as a German supporter in his 50s rocked up carrying a toy of Ernie from Sesame Street. There seemed to be no logical explanation for this but the bloke seemed happy enough to pose for a selfie. No doubt some members of the British press and the FA would see this as a disgraceful piss take as well in which case I look forward to having my England Supporters Membership revoked.

One of the key elements in making a three day trip with no accommodation work is making sure you don't fall asleep in random places before the overnight travel element. This can be quite difficult if, say for example, you have had 10 pints across 14 hours on only five hours sleep. The trick is not to sit down, keep moving and find something to occupy yourself. 

Well here we were back at Dusseldorf Station, 20 minutes before the train back to Luxembourg when I made the cardinal mistake of sitting down in the waiting room. The result? Waking up two hours later with my booked train long gone. This was even more ridiculous in light of the fact that there was a bloke physically lying on the floor of the waiting room sleeping when I entered it whom I heartily laughed at owing to his stupidity for getting into a position whereby he was almost certainly going to miss his train. There was egg well and truly on face when I was finally shaken out of my slumber at 4am, 90 minutes after my train pulled out of the station.

Thankfully, the ticketing guards were very understanding of the situation, no doubt still basking in the glow of Podolski's perfect farewell of the previous day. Luxembourg City was eventually reached at 10am and what with it being daylight this time, the chance to explore was taken. 

Lovely Luxembourg City

Luxembourg City

It may be a boring place but it is actually a quite beautiful one. There are plenty of old buildings and a park running through the middle of the city in a valley. There is also the Stade Josy Barthel Stadium, a 20 minute hike from the city centre and home to the famous Luxembourg national team. Unfortunately there was no way in as the place was being prepared for the visit of France 48 hours later so a few photos from the outside had to suffice before heading back into town to do the only thing left to do until the flight home at 9pm - namely, drink some more beer in several more bars.

Stade Josy Barthel, home to the feared Luxembourg National Side

Luxembourg were gearing up for their huge game 48 hours later
against France

As is normally the case, this drinking killed the remaining hours of the day and gave the chance to reflect back on a successful time for all concerned. Lukas Podolski got the send-off he deserved and I ensured Luxembourg is done and dusted and I won't have to go back there again*

*Until England inevitably draw them in qualifying for Euro 2020

Germany: Marc-Andre ter Stegen, Joshua Kimich, Antonio Rudiger, Mats Hummels, Jonas Hector, Julian Weigl (Emre Can), Toni Kroos, Julian Brandt (Andre Schurrle), Lukas Podolski 1 (Sebastian Rudy), Leroy Sane, Timo Werner (Thomas Muller).

England: Joe Hart, Michael Keane, Chris Smalling (John Stones), Gary Cahill, Kyle Walker, Jake Livermore (James Ward-Prowse), Eric Dier, Ryan Bertrand (Luke Shaw), Adam Lallana (Nathan Redmond), Dele Alli (Jesse Lingard), Jame Vardy (Marcus Rashford).

Attendance: 60,109

Germany v England. 26/03/16

"In England when they say there is no beer in the ground, they mean there is no beer in the ground. Here when they say there is no beer in the ground, they mean there is a 2.5% beer in the ground but we're not counting that."

Germany 2-3 England. Olympiastadion.
Saturday 26/03/16

The cycle that English football goes through every two years is a gloriously predictable thing. Not aware of what I am talking about? Well, it goes something like this:

Stage One: Abject performance in a tournament.

Stage Two: Talk of needing to build a young side for the future to gain experience in the next tournament.

Stage Three: Several young players emerge and England sail through qualification, beating several substandard teams.

Stage Four: Qualification assured, there is an encouraging friendly win against one of the best sides in the world.

Stage Five: Just before the next tournament, optimism is rife as people talk about winning a first trophy since 1966.

Then you go back to Stage One and repeat. Ladies and Gentleman, welcome to Berlin on March 26th 2016 for Stage Four.

This was one of the best England trips of recent memory and it still would be even if there wasn’t such a stirring comeback in a stadium as iconic as the Olympiastadion. Berlin is simply a fantastic city that lives and breathes history. It seems like every time you turn a corner you are greeted by something historic, whether it be a remnant of the wall that divided the western and eastern worlds, the massive television tower at Alexanderplatz lavishly built by the DDR or one of the many sites that played a part in the administration of the Nazi’s.

Berlin Television Tower

Of course, that means there is plenty of sightseeing to do which would at least delay arrival in the pub on Friday until dinner time. Having arrived in Berlin at approximately 4pm, that was around four hours – FOUR HOURS - in which no beer was taken. Unheard of on a trip to the Fatherland. 

Checkpoint Charlie - where America met Russia

No weapons off duty please

How can somebody spend FOUR HOURS sightseeing I hear you cry. This is how: Firstly, there was the most famous border crossing of the Berlin Wall at Checkpoint Charlie where American’s and Russian’s would stare each other down. Second, the Wall itself which features an excellent exhibition entitled Topography of Terror which details the rise and fall of Adolf Hitler and the Nazi Party on the site of the now demolished SS building. That was an hour alone gone there on a 100 metre strip of fascinating and harrowing wall.

Topography of Terror dealing with the rise of the Nazi's -
Goebbels, Goering and Hitler

Berlin Wall

Then you have the Fuehrerbunker which must be the most visited residential carpark in the world,the Memorial to the Murdered Jews of Europe, the Brandenburg Gate, the Reichstag Building and the aforementioned television tower. It’s thirsty work, which is where The Pub came in. Just when you think The Pub With No Name in Tallinn is the most imaginatively named venue in Europe, Berlin tops it with The Pub. It is such a German name - straightforward and efficient. And just like the country we were in, it encouraged beer and plenty of it.

Site of the Fueherbunker - now just a car park

The Reichstag

The Pub had a simple premise. Each table had its own set of beer taps from which you poured your own beer. On a big screen, there was a league table which showed how many litres of beer each table had consumed. The basic challenge was drink as much as you can as quickly as you can to get to the top of the league. Table 14 made a slow start to proceedings before coming from nowhere to look like European qualification was on. And with The Pub about to shut, we had our own “AGUEEEERRROOOOOOOOOO” moment to steal top spot with a late necking of several pints. We’re table 14, we’re top of the league!

Table 14 sitting in a play off spot before that late surge to the top

We're table 14, we're top of the league!

Game day was no less a subdued affair. There were England fans all over Berlin in places varying from the Irish Bars (why go to Germany and drink in a bloody Irish pub?) to the many pop up bars that you stumble across in squares. It was in one such square that we came across a green beer that looked like it had been made by sticking Bruce Banner in one of those smoothie maker contraptions that are all the rage with health freaks, waiting for him to transform into the Hulk and then blending him down into an alcoholic liquid.

Never drink green beer

Indeed it did taste a bit like drinking a gamma ray induced mutant that had subsequently been turned into a beer. The first few sips were decent but after that it was akin to drinking nuclear waste. One pint of that was enough so naturally several more pints were needed to cleanse the pallet and then it was onto the Olympiastadion.

There was plenty to do in Olympischer Platz just outside the stadium with bars, a strange double decker bus which had Die Mannschaft’s squad painted on the side and a penalty shootout game whereby lots of young German children had four attempts to get a ball through one of two holes into a goal. Given their panache from spot kicks, it will come as little surprise to hear that most of the children partaking all managed to score with at least one of their efforts. 

McCarthy and Alastair join Die Mannschaft

What will astound, shock and even amaze you is that yours truly having joined the queue also managed to bend one into the bottom corner with his third effort. Target achieved, the fourth penalty was a case of lean back and send it as far away into the crowds as possible which was greeted with lots of “ooooh”, “aaaaaaah” and one excellent cry of “What ze f**k”. With an English man taking it, the gathered masses probably thought it was just another shocking English penalty and not deliberate. But just to confirm that some of us can take penalties, Alastair also slotted one of his efforts into the top corner. We’re both free this summer if you need us, Roy.

"What ze fuck" - McCarthy's penalty disappears into the crowd

In the late 90s with Berlin reunified, there was quite a debate about what to do with the Olympiastadion and the legacy it had from, in particular, the 1936 Olympics when Jesse Owens won four medals in what was supposed to be a games that demonstrated the dominance of the Aryan race. (Interesting fact learnt at the Topography of Terror – Hitler did not refuse to celebrate Owens’ medals, he was asked by the IOC to show neutrality throughout the Games.) Some favoured tearing it down and building a new stadium from scratch, others wanted to slowly let it decay while there was also a strong argument for renovation. 

Olympiastadion

In the end, renovation won the day – all the seats in the stadium are now grey to remind visitors of its dark past - and for this writer this was clearly the right decision as it is now a superb modern arena with a fantastic atmosphere. It hasn’t lost its soul, you can feel history oozing out of the magnificent outer stone walls and great feats are still being recorded there to this day with the current 100m world record from Usain Bolt set in 2009 at the very top of that list. It is a glowing vindication of the theory that old stadiums are always the best, certainly in comparison to the sort of soulless corporate bowl that Wembley has become since it’s own rebuild.

Team Spirit is the name of the game for Die Mannschaft

The England section next to the Marathon Arch

You expect England fans to be in fine voice wherever they travel but a whole day on the beer, a 9pm local time kick off and a packed away end ensured that this was good even by the Three Lions travelling supports high standards. One particular highlight was at the end of the game when some genius decided to play Monty Python’s ‘Always Look on the Bright Side of Life’ over the tannoy with both away and home fans singing along in unison, no one wanting to leave.

Olympiastadion as England produce a mighty comeback

As for the game, well it was a classic. 2-0 down to goals from Toni Kroos and Mario Gomez, goals from Harry Kane, Jamie Vardy and Eric Dier right at the death secured a huge win. Each goal was greeted with wilder celebrations, more beer going flying as pints were launched in joy and so much noise that by the time Dier struck the third you half expected the Olympic Bell just through the Marathon Arch adjacent to the England section to start ringing as a result.

3-2 to the England!

When we did eventually manage to drag ourselves away into the Berlin night it was time for more beer and to thank this wonderful place for being an outstanding city before talk somewhat predictably rolled round to Stage Five of the England cycle. Firstly we had to explain to Lauren who was making her away debut that not every trip - in fact, probably one every 15 years - has that sort of excitement packed into it. But then even us hardened followers of England began to wonder. If we can beat the world champions like that in their own backyard, could we do it again in Paris on July 10th?

Don’t worry, we’ll be back to Stage One by then.

Germany: Manuel Neuer, Emre Can, Antonio Rudiger, Mats Hummels (Jonathan Tah), Jonas Hector, Toni Kroos 1, Sami Khedira, Thomas Muller (Lukas Podolski), Mesut Ozil, Marco Reuss (Andre Schurrle, Mario Gomez 1 (Mario Gotze).

England: Jack Butland (Fraser Forster), Nathaniel Clyne, Gary Cahill, Chris Smalling, Danny Rose, Eric Dier 1, Jordan Henderson, Adam Lallana (Ross Barkley), Dele Alli, Danny Welbeck (Jamie Vardy 1), Harry Kane 1.

Attendance: 71,413